The enticement of feeling understood, validated, and cared for: How does perceiving a partner as responsive affect the sexual arena?

Abstract

Partners' behaviors outside the bedroom may spill over into the bedroom. One such behavior is responsiveness, as it creates a relationship ambiance conducive to the development of intimacy. In this article, I review research demonstrating how perceiving partners as responsive outside the bedroom affects the quality of sexual interactions, highlighting changes in the contextual meaning of partner responsiveness across individuals and relationship stages. I then provide an overview of the costs and benefits of responsiveness within the bedroom. I conclude by suggesting directions for future research on the potential of partner responsiveness for fostering a relationship environment that inoculates against alternative partners as well as for designing social robots and virtual mates for those in need of a surrogate partner.

Keywords: Desire; Responsiveness; Romantic relationships; Sexuality.