Medical professionals are increasingly faced with ethical dilemmas of caring for older patients who are decisionally incapacitated. Most often they rely on family to serve as surrogate decision makers. Does that practice agree with the preferences of the elderly themselves? Examined are the exploratory and qualitative findings of a sample of men and women, age 65 to 91 (N = 71). Comparisons are made between those elderly who have families and those who do not have families regarding the use of and interest in advance directives and proxy appointments. The findings suggest that elderly persons with families prefer to rely on relatives to conduct substitute decision making informally, unencumbered by legally executed living wills or proxy documents. Those without families view friends and doctors as their surrogate resource and endorse the use of legal proxy appointments. Implications for the use of advance directives and further public policy are discussed.